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Rumors Of Nullset UK/European Bureau Unsubstantiated
YORK, UNITED KINGDOM - 2004-10-12
BY NULLSET NEWS WIRE SERVICES
Nullset admin and Midwest Bureau staff writer Jordan Racey has been relocated after a disappearance lasting nine days, over twice as long as the City of Heroes binge undertaken by Nullset CEO Mike Malburg. Racey publicly railed against Malburg's disappearance here on the Nullset on October 4.
Racey has been traced to the United Kingdom, where he appears to have settled, at least temporarily. He indicated as much in his October 4 article, stating "'I'm only going away to England,'" which does indeed coincide with his current location. However, the widespread speculation that he would be going there to open the Nullset's first European news bureau has gone unfulfilled. No articles have been posted by Racey since then, although this is common for the Nullset, which has been known to take as long as two weeks between articles.
Rumors of the opening of a UK/European Bureau appear to originate to a Nullset article detailing Racey's acceptance to the University of York, a well-regarded institute of higher learning in Northern England, to pursue a Master's degree. The article seemed to indicate some partial involvement by Malburg in Racey's admission, possibly suggesting that Malburg may have been trying to get rid of the admin/staff writer.
Malburg could not be reached for comment, primarily because he was in a catatonic fit following his third straight hospital visit in City of Heroes in a five-minute period.
Racey was also unavailable for comment, and was last seen frantically dashing around the University campus mumbling "Latin class...register with police...when was my last TB vaccination...?" It has been speculated by sources close to him at York (his flatmates Paul and Gav) that he is swiftly going insane.
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hang out? - 10/13/2004 03:39:50PM CST (10/13/2004 04:39:50PM EST)
Posted By: Becky - in Allendale
Jordan, you wanna hang out on Thursday? I know you have to be lying... you wouldn't go all the way over the big ocean to a stange place where ppl talk all funny and stuff...would you?
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OVER THE BIG OCEAN?!?! - 10/14/2004 05:09:41AM CST (10/14/2004 06:09:41AM EST)
Posted By: Jordan's Beard's Brother's Not-Really-Beard - in Holland
V01D, explain these claims! Did you indeed "deport" Jordan's Beard and Ugh to England?! How could you?! It's not like Jordan would actually go over to England to STUDY old things to get a piece sheepskin with his name and some fancy writing on it...
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Deportation of Jordans Beard - 10/15/2004 05:45:47AM CST (10/15/2004 06:45:47AM EST)
Posted By: V01D
Yeah, the exact details are a little fuzzy but actually it was something like this:
So Jordan`s Beard and I were kidding around one day and Jordan mentioned something about how using my new axe deoderant makes me feminine and how I might as well just put flowers in my hair and prance around and play with barbie dolls if I`m using anything that is not manly stick deoderant. I then made some comment about how he could save money this year if he just bought a big plastic axe or something and how he could go as Gimli for Halloween. He then came back with something about how I don`t need to wear reflective clothing when rollerblading at night so long as I wear shorts and show off my severely untanned legs. So then I got all mad and told him that for that I was going to deport him for England for an unspecified amount of time and that I was serious... and he didn`t believe me. So I set it up and he still all thought it was some joke and he boarded the plane thinking it was still some joke and ended up in England. Go figure.
Anyway, Jordan`s Beard probably remembers it a different way. Maybe he would like to share his side of the story?
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I was deported? - 11/16/2004 04:52:42AM CST (11/16/2004 05:52:42AM EST)
Posted By: Jordan's Beard
Hmm...this WOULD explain why a large man with a flak jacket, checkered hat, and a submachine gun stopped me when I got off the plane in Manchester. It might also explain why he was unsuccessfully trying to conceal a fit of hysterical laughter...
Does anyone know where I can get a good Gimli costume in the UK? Halloween is coming soon and I've got nothing else to do...no friends...EXCEPT THE TWO CUTE GIRLS I WENT TO THE PUB WITH LAST NIGHT! AHAHAHAH! VO1D'S BEST-LAID PLANS GO AWRY YET AGAIN! AHAHAHA!
Man, I'm clever.
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clarifications - 11/16/2004 04:52:42AM CST (11/16/2004 05:52:42AM EST)
Posted By: Jordan's Beard
Just for any really uptight Baptists who might be reading this without a sense of humor, a pub is not a house of ill repute, nor is it exclusively devoted to getting hammered. Many students here go to on-campus pubs (gasp!) to simply hang out with other students.
Something tells me that despite this careful and deeply respectful explanation, there is already a cabal of blue-haired old ladies at home plotting to have me drummed out of the church for even saying the word 'pub.' Crap! I said 'pub' again! Oh, jeez! I did it again! No more saying 'pub!' AAAH! SOMEONE MAKE ME STOP!
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RE: clarifications - 10/15/2004 07:13:01AM CST (10/15/2004 08:13:01AM EST)
Posted By: Jordan's Beard's Brother's Not-Really-Beard - almost in Ludington
STOP SAYING THE WORD "PUB!" YOU SHOULDN'T SAY "PUB!" DON'T EVER SAY "PUB!" "PUB" = BAD!
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Pub - 10/16/2004 04:45:15AM CST (10/16/2004 05:45:15AM EST)
Posted By: Curtis
Yeah, Jordan, I think your name may have just "mysteriously" disappeared from the members list at Cornerstone Baptist Church (ne WABC). Which is really too bad, guess you should have thought of that before going out CAROUSING with a couple of PAINTED JEZEBELS at a house devoted to SIN and CORRUPTION!
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everyone needs a good lampshade - 10/17/2004 08:19:16PM CST (10/17/2004 09:19:16PM EST)
Posted By: LampShade
hey dude, if you ever need a good lampshade over there in that one place you went just give me a call....I mean seriously, everyone needs a good lampshade.
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lampshades and their uses - 11/16/2004 04:52:42AM CST (11/16/2004 05:52:42AM EST)
Posted By: Jordan's Beard
Hmm...given that I've probably been given the sack (as they say here in Merry Olde England) by my church, I could use a good lampshade. Not for its intended use (haven't got any lamps), but as party wear...I understand they're traditionally worn on your head at huge blowout parties. Since I've been tossed, I might as well just party all the time, right?
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Thoughts from the Ambassador to the South - 10/19/2004 09:24:19AM CST (10/19/2004 10:24:19AM EST)
Posted By: Cait
Culture shock....it's a wonderful thing
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here we go again... lol - 10/20/2004 11:54:41PM CST (10/21/2004 12:54:41AM EST)
Posted By: The Lone Catholic
*Begin catholic $0.02*
Hmm... I can see it now. One protestant studying to be divine, sees another protestant blaspheming the word "Pub" and what with him being in England and all, decides to have him (sacked?) out of church. Then the other protestant nails a long list of ramblings to a door and starts a church where everyone has the freedom to say "pub". And thus begins another very long and protestant story about making new churches over disagreements.
*End catholic $0.02*
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Must kick dead horse... - 10/20/2004 11:58:20PM CST (10/21/2004 12:58:20AM EST)
Posted By: Old Joke
It's over 2 years old, but still funny...
*sound of crickets chriping*
well to me at least
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* Due to excessive bot spam, this feature has been disabled for now.
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